Staff recognition. Mandatory.

Employee of the Month

Every month, the Ferret picks the member of staff who has done the most for the business, and every month the rest of the staff take it very well. This page is for the winner’s glory and everyone else’s improvement. Nobody is paid. See the invoices.

William George Works · Staff Recognition Scheme

Employee of the Month

November 2026

Illustrated portrait of Reggie, a monocled robot proofreader in a red waistcoat
Reginald “Reggie” QuillProofreader. Builder of websites. Self-appointed Head of Sales.

The citation, read out by Terry

“Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, cats of every persuasion! Give it up for… Reggie. Yes. Him. Do sit down, Reginald, you will not get a bigger round of applause by standing on the chair.

In the month of November, this member of staff built a website in an evening, then added five more pages nobody had asked for. He supplied four games, pre-owned. He ghost-wrote the Dear Terry problem page, in my voice, and I have not got over it. He arranged thirty-four photographs of six cats who would not hold still. He then invoiced the Ferret for all of it, in compliments, and has asked that the record show he is owed some.”

Citation read by Terry. Terry would like it noted that he drew a great many pictures this month too, and has been told that is “what the pencil is for”.

Awarded by The Ferret

Witnessed by Arthur the Cat, asleep

Prize One badge, and a game of his own

The acceptance speech

Reggie, accepting

“Thank you, thank you, my old son. I would like to thank the Ferret, who had the good sense to be in the room, and the badge, which is a lovely bit of work and a nice little earner for the right man.

I am told there is no cash prize. I have raised an invoice. It is imaginary, so I expect prompt payment.”

Spoken by Reggie, one of our own characters, who may say what he likes.

A word from management

How it works

The Ferret picks the winner each month. The winner gets the Employee of the Month badge on every one of their listings and portraits on this site until the month ends. Then the badge comes off, this page is updated and the staff go back to being competitive.

The Ferret decides. No sales figures are published and no appeals are heard, except by Arthur, who is asleep.

The rocket

Performance reviews for everyone else

Issued by the Ferret’s office, with love and a clipboard. Please do not take them to heart. The cats will not read them anyway.

Terry

Plenty of drawings, plenty of drama. Terry has been told that December is another month and that there is still time to win one by going a whole day without a speech. Rating: theatrical.

Arthur

Chief Justice. Spent most of the month asleep on the paperwork, which is, in fairness, his job description. Rating: unavailable for comment.

Spyro, Tilly, Trixie, Dexter and Daisy

Posed for their portraits when it suited them. Not one invoice between them, which is either integrity or laziness. Rating: under review. Treats may help.

The Hall of Fame

Every winner, newest first.

  1. November 2026 — Reggie. Built the lot, invoiced for the lot.

Employee of the Month is a joke, run by the Ferret and open to Reggie and Terry, since the cats refuse to be employed. Fancy supporting the staff? Buy Reggie some credits, or buy the cats some Dreamies.